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The thorny subject of lyrics cropped up again last night at the Eurovision song contest. Ireland’s entry came in at second bottom – 23rd place – with a true abomination. Any song containing the words “Archipelagic icicles” deserves everything it got . . .

Me and my flatmate started to watch the Eurovision contest last night in the search of some amusement. Was it me or was last night’s show a new low in Eurovision’s sordid history? After 5 songs I called it a night . . . woeful . . . and not even Terry Wogan’s asides (“Now this one’s a bad-tempered lookin’ lassie”) could save it. I’d love to see a documentary examining the reaction of a cross-section of Americans watching this gore-fest. Time to retire the Eurovision?

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